
Dear Friends,
Last week, I was at the Odette Cancer Centre in Sunnybrook Hospital, signing copies of my anthology, Cancer Heroes. The air was heavy with stories of hope, courage, resilience, and sometimes quiet surrender. My heart was full of gratitude for the moments when my path crossed with incredible people whose ordinary lives carried extraordinary wisdom. One such encounter left an indelible mark on me, and I feel compelled to share it with you.
It all started when a man, probably in his late 60s, approached my table. His silver hair shimmered like a crown of wisdom, earned through a life of experiences. He didn’t seem interested in buying my book, and that was perfectly fine. Not everyone who stops by does; some just want to connect, and honestly, those are my favorite moments.
As cancer survivors, we share an unspoken bond. It’s as if we’re part of an exclusive tribe. The kind where a simple “You too?” leads to a heartfelt “Me too!” and an immediate sense of camaraderie. This man, however, wasn’t just another passerby; he was a living lesson wrapped in humility and grace.
The Unexpected Conversation
He started with the usual questions:“What kind of cancer did you have?”“How long ago?”“And how are you doing now?”
We exchanged pleasantries, and then he leaned in a little closer and whispered, “I have stage 4 cancer, and I won’t live long.”
Before I could complete my automatic response of sympathy— “I’m so sorry to hear that”—he interrupted me, his voice calm and steady.
“No, don’t be sorry. I’ve lived a full life. I did everything I said I would do, and I’m complete with my life. I have a beautiful family—my wife, children, and grandchildren. I lived well, and I am ready to go.”
For a moment, time seemed to freeze. His words weren’t tinged with sadness, fear, anger, frustration or regret. They were an anthem of peace, a testament to a life well lived. I stood there, utterly humbled, staring at this man who had made peace with his mortality in a way most of us can only dream of.
A Moment of Reflection
How many of us can honestly say what he said? How many of us feel complete with our lives? If death were to knock on our doors tomorrow, could we say, “I am ready for you”?
This encounter stirred something deep within me—a mixture of admiration, gratitude, and a call to introspection. His words were not just about death; they were about life. They were a mirror reflecting some hard but necessary questions:
Are we living intentionally, or are we merely existing?
Are we spending our days chasing things that truly matter, or are we stuck in the endless loop of “someday”?
Are we nurturing relationships, cherishing moments, and creating memories that will bring us peace when the end comes?
Lessons from a Cancer Hero
Here are the profound lessons I took away from this man’s wisdom:
1. Live With Intention
Life doesn’t come with a script. It’s up to us to write our own stories. This man’s peaceful acceptance of his mortality stemmed from the fact that he had lived intentionally. He had ticked off his bucket list, not out of fear of running out of time, but because he valued the gift of life every single day.
Takeaway: Stop waiting for the “right time.” The right time is NOW.
2. Prioritize Relationships
He spoke with so much love about his family—his wife, children, and grandchildren. It was clear that his relationships were his greatest treasures.
Takeaway: Spend time with the people you love. Be present. Listen more. Love wholeheartedly.
3. Cultivate Gratitude
Not a single word of regret escaped his lips. Instead, he exuded gratitude for the life he had lived.
Takeaway: Gratitude is a powerful force. Practice it daily, and you will live a richer, more fulfilling life.
4. Embrace Mortality
Most of us avoid thinking about death as if ignoring it will make it go away. But this man embraced his mortality, and in doing so, he freed himself from its fear.
Takeaway: Reflect on your mortality not as a source of dread but as a motivator to live fully.
5. Leave No Regrets
The most striking thing about him was his sense of completeness. He had no “what ifs” or “should haves” weighing him down.
Takeaway: Make choices that align with your values. Say what needs to be said. Do what needs to be done.
A New Perspective on Fulfillment
As I drove home that day, his words echoed in my mind. “I am complete with my life.” They weren’t just words; they were a roadmap. They made me question my own life. Am I chasing things that truly matter? Am I living a life that will leave me feeling complete?
I realized that fulfillment doesn’t come from the number of years we live or the milestones we achieve. It comes from the quality of our experiences, the depth of our relationships, and the courage to live authentically.
What About You?
Now, I turn these questions to you:
If you had just one year left to live, how would you spend it?
Who would you spend it with?
What would you stop doing, and what would you start?
You don’t have to wait for a life-altering diagnosis to start living intentionally. You can begin today, right here, right now.
The Wisdom of Cancer Heroes
Cancer has taught me many things, but perhaps the greatest lesson is this: It strips life down to its essentials. It reminds us of what truly matters and forces us to let go of the rest.
The man I met at the Odette Cancer Centre wasn’t just a cancer survivor but a connoisseur of life. He taught me that the ultimate goal is not to live forever but to live well.
So, my dear reader, let’s not wait for life to nudge us toward these realizations. Let’s choose to live intentionally, love deeply, and leave this world without regrets. After all, as someone once said, “In the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.”
Here’s to living a life so full that, like this remarkable man, we too can one day say, “I am complete.”
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